Social media is full of exhortations these days to pray, as hurricanes, fires, earthquakes, and mass shootings fill the news. And just as demanding is the voice of those who say prayer is doing nothing; action is the only solution.
Offering to keep someone in thoughts and prayers is a time-worn response to hearing of someone’s misfortune or hardships. However, the internet is full of posts criticizing this sentiment as useless and even inappropriate. I, for one, disagree that prayer is useless.
Prayer is considered a request or demand for all sorts of personal benefits: money, health, and so on. It is sometimes an expression of thanksgiving. Those who have no inclination toward the existence of a higher power sometimes pray too. This prayer, instead of to a deity, can be to their higher self, to the universe or just going through the motions as a way to reinforce positive, mindful thinking.
Prayer isn’t just for the religious. It has a deep cultural and psychological value that everybody can appreciate, regardless of their personal beliefs. Many use prayerbooks and memorize certain prayers to be said over and over. Such articulations are a natural reaction to hearing any sort of news, good or bad, and the ubiquitousness of these responses doesn’t necessarily make them insincere. In fact, sincerity is a necessity for a true prayer.
Why Pray?
We are born and raised in a self-centered perception and sensation of the world, which leads to an accumulation of problems in our lives. We pray that we will be relieved of these troubles. But what if our encounters with all kinds of problems are for the purpose of giving us a desire to rise above our current perception and sensation, and discover a new world, one of love, care, and positive connection among everyone?
We are not programmed to care for others because we are ruled by ego — that inner force that convinces us that we can do anything we want just to fulfill all our desires without any consideration of how our actions affect others. Everything we do is for self-benefit, even when we don’t realize it. Ego breeds hate in the forms of greed, meanness toward others, wars and general chaos in the world. Despite all the prayers offered by millions all over the world, these manifestations of hate don’t disappear. In fact, we see them growing.
So, what if true prayer is not asking for something for ourselves, but for others? From childhood on we learn in many ways that we are not supposed to hurt others. Children are admonished for sassing, hitting, stealing and so on, and laws exist to enforce good behavior. Few of us grow up without being taught “Love others as you love yourself.” But as we watch the world around us, we see the opposite in the actions of others.
Is Prayer an Antidote for the Evil in the World?
Yes, I think it is, but only if we understand its purpose and how to raise a true prayer, one that asks for self-transformation. In other words, change me from being egoistic to being altruistic. Grant me the strength to contemplate the effects on others from my actions and to perform any deed only when I can derive pleasure by the performing of the act itself. If I do something because it will make me feel good and be proud of myself, I am violating the Golden Rule.
There is a famous tale in the Talmud about a Gentile who wanted to convert to Judaism. He challenged the famous Talmudic sage, Hillel, by saying he would accept Judaism if Hillel could teach him the whole Torah while he stood on one foot. The sage’s response was: “What is hateful to you, do not do to your neighbor. That is the whole Torah; the rest is the explanation of this — go and study it!”
This story articulates in an astute way that the basic law of the Torah is to love our friends as ourselves. A close examination of most of the other religions of the world reveals that at the basis of them all is some version of: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Mankind has always intuited the wisdom of caring for each other.
When we connect together in the understanding that our thoughts actually impact the collective unconscious with the imperative to love one other, the nature of prayer becomes praying for rather than praying to.
We live in a world, an integral system that is connected on every level; thus everything we do, say or think affects every point in the system. The meanness and hate within mankind that reside in the system characterizes it as one that is hostile and chaotic. We have created this, and our challenge is to reverse the negative direction of society to one that is positive, accepting and loving. In other words, to change our inner desire from wanting what we want when we want it to one of caring for others before ourselves.
The aim of prayer is to change this trajectory. Prayer can be a demand, a request, an expression of fear, of respect or of joy; It is important that this plea be correct. A prayer should be whole and complete, which means to stem from all the different possible feelings, from different relations and attitudes towards the Creator, from different states: descents, ascents, detachment, indifference, and an emotional attitude.
It is different for every individual, and we all add our states to one another in order to get a whole prayer. Some of the people are above in their feelings and some are below. Some cry, others laugh, and some are indifferent. The prayers can be quite different, of different types, on different levels, and from different people: for themselves, for society, for family, for the world.
Prayer means reaching a true desire to love others as we love ourselves, as well as a revelation of the full extent to which we really do love ourselves. If our desire, our prayer, is true and from the bottom of our hearts, then we become awarded with help from a higher power that corrects our egoistic desire to receive all for ourselves, granting us the ability to love others to the extent of our own self-love.